Chalk Art

The chalk board in the Sunday School room used to be a problematic distraction from the things I had planned for the kids. I tried putting away the chalk. The kids always got it out again. Finally I figured out the obvious: don't fight it, use it.

I don't let the kids use the chalkboard just anytime, but during the times I give them choices about what to do (modeled after an approach I picked up at a Godly Play training session), working on the chalkboard is one of the options. One or more of the children often choose to work with chalk and their work appears meaningful.

I've photographed some of their work before erasing it and plan to include some pictures in the display of personal Christmas items at church beginning Christmas Eve. They're pleased about this and I hope it communicates to them that their work is valuable, which I believe it is.

Church Uniforms

A few Sunday mornings back a special event was being celebrated at church. The church was unusually full with people who had come specifically for the occassion. They were dressed up, men in dark suits, etc. The attire was quite appropriate to the occasion, but certainly more formal then the congregation as a whole dresses usually. A child asked me, "Why are all those men wearing the same uniform?"

A Grown-up in Church

The unusual experience of attending a church event without my children last night was the final impetus for starting a new blog: A Grown-up in Church. You can find it through the link on the side of this blog. Its address is www.agrown-upinchurch.blogspot.com.

Liturgical Language

Recently I've noticed a new kind of participation in the church service by one of my kids. They've started to verbally join in parts of the service where the congregation speaks or sings. Sometimes they know the words, often they don't, but mumble along anyway. I wonder what they think, what they feel, what factors consciously or unconsciously motivate this.

I've also found in Sunday School the kids are often very responsive to chances to lead or respond to brief liturgical exchanges such as:

God be with you. - And also with you.
(God is with you or The Lord be with you meet the same enthusiasm and ease.)
Let us give thanks to the Lord our God.- It is right to give our thanks and praise.
Hear what the Spirit is saying to God's people. - Thanks be to God.

Reading the transcript of "Speaking of Faith: The Spirituality of Parenting," (see previous post) reminded me of this. Rabbi Sandy Sasso spoke about kids needing a language to express their spirituality. I don't think she meant just learning the language of liturgical responses. But I do think this can be a valuable part of it.

A bit later Rabbi Sasso says these things that are akin to my perspectives:

"I think much of religious education tends to be the transmission of a set of rules or dogmas or information. But the very best religious education is much broader than that and gives children a sense of a greater presence. I mean, why follow the rules, you know? Why do the rituals? Why pray? I mean what's behind all that?"

For some liturgy can be cold, dry, boring recitation while for others that same liturgy can be rich, evocative and filled with positive meaning. Realistically our experience of it within a given Sunday, from week to week or between given periods of our lives varies. It can include both those descriptions and points in between.

So the question is, what factors will help kids be able to experience meaning through these phrases? How do I teach these phrases in a way that will facilitate that? What general approaches should I take or not take? (I know, books have been written on that topic.) What insight or questions do you have on this from your own interaction with kids or your own experience with liturgy? What allows liturgy to be meaningful rather than empty?

Where Do I Start?

Where do I start to talk about all the things that I got excited about listening to "Speaking of Faith: The Spirituality of Parenting?" I missed its original broadcast, but there it was again last Sunday. Listen for yourself or read the transcript through http://speakingoffaith.org. It too asks, where do I start, in relation to spirituality, religion and children we care about. Its insights are applicable well beyond issues of children and parenting, which I guess is as it should be.

Where do I start? I'll take a stab in my next entry.

The Typical Question

If you ask yourself or kids the typical question for this time of year, what are you thankful for, I'm guessing you'll get a mix of three kinds of answers:

1) "I don't know" or "nothing"
2) Things we're thankful for in a logical, mental way
3) Things for which we have heart felt appreciation and gratitude

I'm not knocking #2, but what's more interesting to me is #3. Sometimes I think we don't know how or don't get around to recognizing those things. Sometimes thanks can seem a bit of an abstract concept.

How might we recognize things for which we are thankful? How might we foster deeper appreciation for things we're only logically thankful for? Here are some ideas I'd like to try out more.

• Notice when your kids spontaneously say thanks - beyond the obligatory times. What is it they're appreciating? What are they saying thanks for?
• Notice when you say thanks - the matter of course times and the intentional times. What are you appreciating? What are you saying thanks for?
• Notice what you or your kids really enjoy.
• Practice mindfulness.
• Try playing games that facilitate thinking and talking about the things we like. For example, we have a game called Whoonu that involves players guessing what among several things another player likes best. That player then ranks the things guessed by the other players to be their favorite.
• Make a game of tracing things taken for granted back through the long processes by which they come to us and back to their origins

I'd be interested in your thoughts on the topic, and what happens if you try some of the approaches above.

Hearing When You Least Expect It

At our house we frown on calling other people stupid. In a recent sermon Aron told a story in which he quoted one character calling another stupid. One of my kids, who I had no idea was tuning in at all, was delighted to tell me, "Aron said stupid! Aron said stupid!"

I wonder what else they're hearing that I wouldn't guess.

Children's Bibles

I've never been too taken with children's bibles. One problem was that they aren't really Bibles (this doesn't bother me so much these days.) They seem to have dry archaic illustrations, or laborious text, or more sexism than I can easily swallow, or insert too much moralizing, or whatever.

I thought I had a hit with Read Aloud Bible Stories by Ella K. Lindvall. Colorful illustrations, lyric text...but I choked when the creation story talked about the creation of a daddy and a beautiful mommy. It didn't talk about a beautiful daddy and beautiful mommy, the daddy wasn't cited as handsome, the mommy wasn't intelligent and wise.....but she was beautiful! I tried skipping over those pages....but kids kind of notice that (and it wasn't the right time for a discussion on sexism.)

Maybe I haven't looked far enough for good children's bibles. I've just generated a list of over 100 collections of bible stories from the public library. I didn't expect to find so many! I probably won't go for the Precious Moments Storybook Bible. But, I do have lots to check out: a board book, a comic book, The Bible in Pictures for Little Eyes, The Taize Picture Bible, The Bible-The Really Interesting Parts....

I'll let you know what I find. Meanwhile I'm curious about your experiences. Do you remember a children's bible from when you were a kid? Have you found some that you & kids you know either like or dislike?

Jumping In

I plan to write about children in church from the perspective of a volunteer children's and family minister and of a parent. I also want to explore what it means as adults to be in community with children, and what Jesus' words about welcoming children and being like them may mean.

Someone encouraged me not to be daunted by the idea of writing for most anyone to read by saying that no one will read this anyway. I'll try to take courage from that, but hope it's not entirely true. I hope this will provide a forum for at least some thought and discussion - (beyond that in my own head!)