Children in Church

Boredom

2009-11-02T01:25:00.007-06:00

I think my kids, and their friend who came as a guest today, were more or less bored out of their minds for most of this Sunday's service. Furthermore, when I inquired about what they found best and worst about church today, the positive things, truly good though they may be, were nothing related specifically to church. They could have experienced those same things had we stayed home or gone to a park.

Granted, boredom has value. It's not the end of the world. And I can grant several other things that the kids couldn't express, which give a positive perspective on the value of their participation in church this morning and week after week.

But that would be a poor excuse for not trying to figure out what I should do about how understandably bored my kids (who I make coming the norm for) and many adults (who make their own choice not to come) are by Sunday morning services.

Lets be honest about what goes on in church, what it takes to engage, and who that does or doesn't serve.

I don't want to take anything meaningful away from anyone. And I'm not talking about dumbing down. But, how can we shape a church service and faith community that is more accessible and engaging to a wider range of people (and including ourselves)?

This is not just a curious or academic question for me, or one of assenting to church beliefs about evangelism or the like. More personally, I long to have regular ways to share explicit spiritual expression and faith community with friends for whom church is not regular part of their life and for whom services as we conduct them would be unlikely to fit the bill. But significantly more important to me than that is my concern for my kids. As good as church as they experience it may be for them, and in spite of what I or others have done with kids in mind at my particular church, I am not satisfied with what I'm giving them, nor do I think I should be. And they're getting older every day, every Sunday, every season. I can not let this issue die. Actually, I don't think it would even if I wanted it to. So I must find ways to act.

Proximity - Come on Down

2009-10-05T22:48:00.001-05:00

Last Sunday (again) my not so young youngest asked to be picked up during church. Then he fidgeted between positions involving limbs, me and pews.

How much does being at a distance from the altar effects one's ability to engage? What about all the shoulders & heads blocking a child's view?

I remember taking one of my kids to the zoo when very little. While I I tried to point out animals she was fixated on things much closer like plants or rocks.

Where would you like to sit for a concert or baseball game, a meeting at work, dinner out, a bus ride?

St Gregory's of Nyssa notes they have a "children's space, next to the presider's chair, so they can have a better view of the action of the liturgy."

How does proximity effect you in church? Children you've observed? What approaches has your church taken?

What if we all could moved in closer?

Ribbon Sticks

2008-11-26T02:39:00.003-06:00

This blog gets lots of hits from people doing internet searches about ribbon sticks.

What are you all doing (or trying to do) with ribbon sticks?

Ribbon sticks are a topic on this site because at the church where I work with kids, we've been making a set of ribbon sticks for each color of the liturgical year. At the beginning of each liturgical season, and sometimes on other occasions, kids are invited to carry the ribbon sticks during the procession at the beginning of the service. If there are enough ribbon sticks to go around the choir and clergy carry them too. And yes, even though I'm not a child, clergy or choir member, I usually join the procession with a ribbon stick too. Somebody has to model for the kids and give them directions, right? (Working with kids is such a handy "excuse" for doing fun stuff.)

We make the sticks like this:

Cut wooden dowels into desired lengths.
Sand dowels as needed.
Cut strips of ribbon. Various widths and styles are good.
Tape a set of ribbons to the end of each stick
Secure the ribbons with a staple gun.

Things to consider:

Height of the people who will carry the ribbon sticks: Sticks and ribbons for small children have needed to be shorter than I imagined. Ribbons can easily end up on the floor & under foot.

Where do the sticks go after their main use? Deposit them in decorative containers of sand? Keep them for waving in other parts of the service? Gather them up before they become weapons?

Making the ribbon sticks can be a fun intergenerational project.

Omniscience

2008-09-24T01:40:00.003-05:00

I've come to find out that at least one of my children does not believe that God knows everything.

I'm not sure I've ever given any explicit input on the topic, which kind of makes it all the more interesting. I'm not sure what to make of it.

You never know what kids are absorbing or not. Apparently this kid has not absorbed the prayer that's a regular part of our Sunday services and that happens to be one of my favorites:

Almighty God, to you all hearts are open, all desires known, and from you no secrets are hid...

(btw: I imagine that prayer could be heard as threatening and intimidating, but I don't hear it that way. I find it a great comfort.)

This all came up when we were talking about a story in a book in which people hid something from God. I wondered out loud about why the people did this. I said, in a tone that left an opening for agreement or disagreement, that I thought God knew everything. My child said that no, he didn't. You can hide things from God by putting them someplace he doesn't know about. Like our garage.

I wonder how you know what places God knows about or not. I might have to ask about that tomorrow.

And yes, my child did identify God as he. In spite of my use of gender neutral terms for God, it seems both of my children have readily absorbed this important aspect of our religious and cultural patriarchy. But then if God doesn't know about things in our garage, maybe there are a lot of things he doesn't know about. Maybe he doesn't know what it means to be female. We'll have to see what we can do about that.

Play on Speaking of Faith

2008-09-17T16:32:00.000-05:00

Given my previous post, when I found the opportunity this afternoon to catch up on one of the many Speaking of Faith podcasts that I haven't gotten to, I thought this one would be a good choice.

Play, Spirit + Character

I recommend it.

You can listen to the program, read the transcript or explore a number of related items through the link above.

Playing

2008-09-17T12:46:00.005-05:00

We're back into the program year so this is a good time to get back to regular posting here.

Ironic that its the program year that provides the impetus, because the first thing I have to say is about play.

The importance of play is old news of course, but I'm in the process of learning its importance personally. It's been a reoccurring theme, highlighted this summer by my neighbor's wise insistence as I prepared for vacation that I use the time to PLAY with my kids. It all fits together wonderfully with the numerous bits of insight that keep reinforcing my conviction that the gospel about becoming like little children in order to enter the realm of God's reign is deeply significant.

Sunday I saw the relevance of play again. The kids were quiet and reserved. Clearly some of what I'd planned would not work because the kids weren't comfortable enough to participate in the ways I had imagined. So I went with plan B and read a Bible story in the form of a pop up book. They slid right up close to the book and were eager to open flaps and pull tabs. Then we played with play dough. We used it as a bridge to the story and other topics of the day. But the more important aspect was that it opened up our interactions and relationships. We were talking, playing and imagining together.

So...(I say to myself as much as you)...yes, you have to be the adult, do the planning, keep the big picture and all...but make sure you let go and play...let the children teach you...don't let yourself or the children miss that opportunity.

PLAY!

Here Comes Fun

2008-06-22T02:13:00.003-05:00

Under Construction: A Habitat for Humanity Vacation Bible School.
July 14-18
9-Noon
with St Mark's
for age 4 - completed 4th Grade

Contact me for more information

The adult planners are probably getting as excited about what we're doing as the kids will be doing it.

Among the fun & cool things we hope to pull off: building this playhouse.

Don't you wish you were a kid?

Creation Stories

2008-06-05T19:33:00.003-05:00

Work with kids gave me a great "excuse" recently to do something I'm always interested in.

I checked out a collection of children's creation story books.

Some are a pretty close rendering of the biblical story.
Some of them are creative re-tellings, obviously based on the biblical story.
Some are creation stories from other cultures.

Its been fun to read them to my kids, asking questions like
Who is God in this story?
What in this story is the same or different from the creation story (really stories of course) in the Bible?

You don't have to lead Children's Church to enjoy this kid of project.
You could easily take it on at home (whether your have kids or not).
Enjoy.

Old Hundredth

2008-05-22T05:17:00.003-05:00

Sunday I recognized this hymn tune (one of the few I recognize by name) and mentioned it to one of my kids. I probably heard, sang or played this tune almost every Sunday throughout my childhood. We sang it as The Doxology: Praise God from whom all blessings flow...

Who would have thought the brief mention of the tune's name would stick in my child's mind. You never know what will!

A few days later the child brought up the name of the tune and informed me that they had made up words about it....along the lines of "There is a song called Old Hundredth, its a hundred years old...."

So we looked up some info (how did we learn things before Wikipedia?), learned that its about 460 years old, and I made up some of my own words about the origins of the tune, that can be sung to it. I had fun. Maybe it will turn into a fun learning tool. We'll see.

Maybe a reader out there will make up some more words to familiar tunes that we could use to learn the music of our tradition and the history and meanings that come with it. Serious or funny or whatever you like. You don't have to be a music scholar. Do you ever make up different words for Row, Row, Row your boat? Then you can do it.

Aside from the question of alternate lyrics, what are your favorite hymns? What hymns would you like your kids to learn?

Thank You

2008-05-14T02:48:00.002-05:00

Thank you to all the people who attended the NAECED conference and gave Gethsemane children's books !

I've browsed through them and see lots of good things. It will be great to have these books all readily available for both formal and informal uses at Gethsemane.

They're all available in a basked in the children's area. I've set some out on the children's table and will continue to do so. I'm confident some will end up being read out loud during church services or in children's church. I try to borrow books like this from the public library or the Church Resource Center. But these can stay at Gethsemane and be available to us ongoingly. What wonderful support this is. Thank you again.

I hope to write a brief review of each of them, one at a time, here on this blog. So check back.

And whether you gave a book, are a parent interested in material for your kids, a children's minister wanting info, or perhaps a best of all, an adult who knows how great children's books are for everybody, check out the books and then share the wonder with a kid!

Bumpy Sunday

2008-04-22T01:28:00.005-05:00

My time at church on Sunday was frustrating. Nothing horrible happened. It was just a string of things that were a bit off.

I got to church late...
...the exits and entrances for Children's Church were disjointed...
...kids were scattered when they shouldn't have been...
...I was poorly prepared which in Murphy's law style correlated to having a large group if kids this week vs the small group I had the week before when I was much better prepared (though of course large numbers of kids and good preparation are always both good things)...
...I couldn't remember names that I should know by now...
...there was a misunderstanding to sort out...
...my own kids got involved in helping me tell the story in a way that I didn't (and don't) know how I should best handle...
...we lost a sharp pin...
...I forgot the matches to light the candle...
...the story telling materials ended up in a jumble...
...just as someone wanted to lock the main door I was dashing in and out trying to help find a child who had apparently made an unreported "detour"...
...I was loosing my patience with my own kids who couldn't seem to respond appropriately to my directions to help clean up the kids' area...
... and by the time I got that all taken care of we were the last ones out of the church ...
...and I had about an hour to pick up lunch (my first meal of the day), get home, eat it and get to work.

"How are you?" a co-worker asked.
Response: "I'm not firing on all cylinders." I felt very tired.

Hopefully I'll suceed in getting tuned up this week.

The Sheep, the Wolf & the Shepherds

2008-04-15T00:51:00.004-05:00

I had another good experience telling a Godly Play style story (really from Young Children and Worship) Sunday.

One child really seems to have grasped who Jesus is in these stories. When the Jesus character is introduced in other terms, like the Good Shepherd, this child is quick to interject, "Jesus!"

One kid had an interesting question: When the Good Shepherd stood between the wolf and the sheep that were scattered, were those sheep his own sheep or the Ordinary Shepherd's sheep?

The issue that resonated strongest with me was that one or two kids wanted to put the wolf (who of course represented danger or worse) in the sheepfold with the sheep. One of them who told their own story with the materials worked it out so that the wolf was friendly and wouldn't hurt the sheep.

Probably this is due to the naivete of the fortunate young who have, thankfully, not yet had to come to terms with much danger, darkness, or evil. But I wonder about the idea that it is a mindset not yet acculturated to so readily dichotomize the world into the good and the bad, us and them; a mindset not so quick to assume and label.

I find it interesting that the natural inclination of these children seems to be to care for the well being of the wolf, while the theological perspective of the story is seemingly otherwise, at least at an adult's first glance.

Of course I don't want to put any children at any sort risk by not applying the wisdom and perspective of an adult to protect them from all kinds of danger. But neither do I like the idea that our Christian agenda might often be to squelch or redirect this caring response of the children.

Likewise I found myself uncomfortable with the Good Shepherd vs Ordinary Shepherd Distinction. In common usage of the term, most of us are more or less ordinary, in ways we don't always identify as bad. Is there something wrong with the ordinary? Is ordinary not good? Is ordinary bad? Is this a statement of human nature as being inherently basically bad, sinful or inadequate? It's not that I approve of the job the Ordinary Shepherd did in letting the sheep scatter or in running away when the wolf came. But is ordinary the best term for these actions of the "Ordinary Shepherd"? Is this what an ordinary shepherd would do? What other terms might be used than ordinary?

At least I think we need to wonder if the children might be onto something that we adults would do well to learn from. I wonder if their responses have anything to do with what the gospel means when it talks about the need to become as little children to enter the kingdom of God.

Who Ate the Bread?

2008-04-02T11:42:00.004-05:00

What bread?

The answers are in "In God's Hand's," a book by Lawrence Kushner and Gary Schmidt, Illustration by Matthew J Baek, published by Jewish Lights Publishing that I found at the Hennepin County/Minneapolis Public Library. Here's the catalog entry.

It tells the story of two people who think they are subjects of miraculous interactions with God and then discover the agents of action are each other. At first they are disappointed, thinking that God has not been involved after all. Then then come to understand that their hands are God's hands.

The story is much more delightful and compelling than my summary. However, even if I were sure how to give a better explanation, I'd want to leave the joy of discovering the story to you. And as always, good children's books aren't just for kids...

Of Course You Missed the Sermon

2008-03-25T11:18:00.002-05:00

Rev. Snyder told me once that during the time his children were small, his wife didn't hear his sermons for years.

I'm pretty sure she was at church.
I'm pretty sure any parents reading this don't need me to explain why she missed the sermons.

I hope you know that if you miss Aron's sermons, much of the time you have the good fortune of being able to read them on his blog.

His Easter sermon is there and is well worth the read.

Godly Play Materials

2008-03-14T17:07:00.007-05:00

In response to my comment in a previous post about how well kids are responding to the Godly Play style stories, in spite of materials made with paper & scissors, a reader asked further about the materials. Here are a couple pictures and some info.

This picture includes Jesus (purple figure in center) talking to Zaccheaus in the tree. They are by Jericho (left of the tree) on the way to Jerusalem (on the right end of the purple underlay).

Most of the stories use a felt underlay. I've been making these easily enough.

The figures used in the stories are supposed to be wood. The Young Children and Worship book has patterns for them. Not having the skills to make them of wood, I've compromised by making them of tag board & construction paper, or depending on the item, plain old corrugated cardboard from used boxes. Stories often call for other items as well...special boxes, baskets, candles or other more story specific things.

Last week I used artificial leaves from a stem purchased at a craft store and squares of cloth cut from my stash of scrap material at home. (I knew there would be a use for it sometime, right?)

This week I've managed to use craft store items (wood, paint & modeling clay) to make a table, plate, cup and loaf of bread that I'm pretty happy with.

However I'd say my cardboard "backdrop of the upper room" leaves something to be desired. But, at least on a basic level it will serve the purpose. It doesn't have the beauty & quality probably called for...but it will have to do. (Can somebody who understands this stuff better explain why I can't get an empty line between paragraph above and the one below?!?)

The stories in Young Children & Worship are not all the same as the ones in Godly Play. I have not found the materials for Young Children & Worship available to purchase (even though Godly Play Resources sells the Young Children & Worship Book.) Godly Play does have materials available for purchase. Some of them I think are better obtained in more cost effective ways. Others my sensibilities about expenditures have kept me from ordering for other reasons, though eventually I anticipate I will order some of those that would be the most challenging to make or otherwise obtain.

Purchased: Children's Bible

2008-03-12T16:06:00.004-05:00

After borrowing the Read and Learn Bible from the Resource Center for Churches, I decided to buy a copy.

My children each wanted their own. My oldest tried to claim sole ownership of the one I bought. But I'm maintaining that it belongs to all of us. I want to use it too (not only for my work at church but personally!)

A few of you may know that my idea of in depth Bible study is pretty hard core. Don't mistake that to think that I don't think it's great to being able to sit down and read a huge chunk of the Bible (basic versions of major stories that is) in one sitting. I'm also happy to find this resource of child friendly versions of stories. It will make my work as a parent and at church easier.

My oldest child has a ton of paper scraps in it marking stories to read. I think that's great.

What do I like about this Bible?

My kids' excitement about it.
The pictures aren't dry and musty looking. Neither do they exceed my cutesy tolerance threshold.
The text is visually appealing. It's is a modest amount in large print. Enough to tell the story. Not so much as to make one hesitant to delve in.
The stories are told in ways that I think are basic & accessible without excessive embellishment or interpretive commentary.

My main complaint to this point: I would prefer more gender neutral language.

The technicalities:

The text is a paraphrase using the Contemporary English Version and the King James Version.
It says it's oriented to kids 5-8 (or 4-7 depending where you read.)
Published by Scholastic with the cooperation of the American Bible Society in 2005.

This Stuff Works!

2008-03-03T10:49:00.003-06:00

Again this Sunday I was impressed with the results of using a story from Young Children and Worship or Godly Play. My experience and training in these curricula are limited, my materials are mostly home made out of cardboard and paper...and still I see such interest and response from children!

I was able to give a couple kids a lot of time to work with the story materials themselves after I told the story about Zacheaus. They are eager to do this. One child used the materials to work through the story again without using the words. The other child largely made up new scenarios with the materials. The most poignant of these in my mind was when the child had someone say to Zacheaus: "Do you know why people don't like you? Go that way," pointing toward Jesus, "There is a man who will love you."

Math as a Spiritual Matter

2008-02-21T00:06:00.002-06:00

If we think of one aspect of spirituality as having to do with making a connection to that which is beyond ourselves, many things have a spiritual dimension.

One of my children began asking about which numbers are real....a gazillion? a billion?....

This led to the child saying that numbers are interesting.....not regular numbers like 1 or 9 or 100, but numbers like 101. It was as if at that point the limits of the imagination were stretched to the point of fascination with that which is known to be there, but which can not quite be known.

It gives me another hint/question about what it might mean to enter the realm of God like a little child.

I got to talking at work about my child's questions. It's led to wonderful conversations. Not religious conversations per se, but conversations that, at least for me (and I can only speak for me) have spiritual impact and theological implications. This is especially gratifying in light of my post related to all the time I spend at work vs with people from church, and the idea it led to that I ought avail myself to connecting more with people at work.

Quite a lot has come from a conversation with a child. Not that I should be surprised, right?

New Connection - Born Again

2008-02-14T11:19:00.009-06:00

Reflecting on a child's response, I became concerned that they might have misunderstood the part of last week's story that says that one who does not receieve the kingdom of God like a little child will not enter it. Did I or the text ever say "as a child" rather than "like a child"? Did they hear "as a child" and think it meant "when a child" rather then "like a child"?

Such a scary responsiblity this buisness of teaching children sometimes seems.

The brighter note here is the connection the line of thought brougth me.

It's not that one has to receive the kingdom of God WHEN a child in order to enter it.
One can recieve the kindgom of God LIKE a child at any time or age.
We can be like a child at any age....we can be BORN AGAIN.
I hadn't thought of it that way before.

So far I haven't gone back to the biblical texts to check out how well that interpretive connection holds up. But in my mind the connection seems meaningful, helpful, worth further exploration.

Parenting on SOF

2008-02-08T15:09:00.000-06:00

Listening to the podcast of the Speaking of Faith broadcast "Remembering Forward" in which Krista Tippett reads from her recent book, also titled Speaking of Faith, I enjoyed hearing her say,

"I know of no richer source of theological enlightenment than parenting."

She said a lot more interesting things, on this topic and others, but I'll leave it to you to pursue the links above if you wish.

Another Speaking of Faith program "Spirituality of Parenting" is one that has a discussion guide available. Anyone interested in using it sometime?

When Will the Story Come Back?

2008-02-04T11:46:00.000-06:00

Yesterday a child asked, "When will the story come back?"

They meant the stories that Aron has read from children's books during Sunday morning services.

We started doing that with the intention of doing it as often as possible. That hasn't turned out to be very often lately. It's hard to find the time to identify a workable book relevant to the text or theme for each week.

Here's an encouragement to up it on the priority list.

Loaves, Fishes, Breakfast Bars & Jesus Bread

2008-01-30T04:35:00.000-06:00

Sunday a child had a cereal bar at church. (Okay, let's be honest....it was one of MY children....and no, I didn't manage to sit them down to eat before church....but I usually do and church was an hour early and...well, you don't need to hear all about it...)

The child with the cereal bar, with adult encouragement, offered some to another child.

As the child with cereal bar broke a piece off and gave it to another child the image reminded me of a celebrant breaking a piece of bread and offering it to a person receiving communion.

But that's not even the most cool part.

When I asked if they knew what it reminded me of when they broke off a piece of the bar and gave it to the other child, an 8 year old piped in and said:

Jesus. Jesus giving people what they need.

The Big Change Next Week

2008-01-14T02:27:00.000-06:00

Beginning Jan. 20th, children of all ages, and parents who wish to accompany them, are invited to the gathering room during the 10AM service after the Collect of the Day. We will take kid friendly approaches to explore readings of the day or other relevant themes as well as prepare for participation in other parts of the service. We will rejoin the full congregation just before the prayers. Following the service art and craft materials will be available in the front of the church. Everyone is welcome to use them.

When Can We Hear the Story?

2008-01-14T02:22:00.000-06:00

I was pleased that when my kids missed a session of the progressive Godly Play Advent/Christmas/Epiphany story, they asked when I would tell it to them! They even brought it up more than once!

I was also pleased to hear that another family liked the stories enough that they became a topic of conversation at their house Sunday evenings.

Something good was going on there.

A Great Book for Next Year

2008-01-01T12:11:00.000-06:00

"Why Christmas Trees Aren't Perfect"

by Richard H Sheneider

Illus by Elizabeth J Miles

Abingdon Press, Nashfield

An evergreen hoping to be chosen as the queen's Christmas tree gives shelter and food to animals in the forest, giving up its aspirations of perfection in the process. Unexpectedly the tree is honored as the queen's choice.

The story itself is much more compelling than my simple summary. It's interesting and rich with multiple points of meaning and metaphor.

It manages this without being either strained with complexity or overly simplistic, at least until the last line when the meaning of the story is stated. As good stories & metaphors often are, the meaning is too rich and the possibilities for application too many to be well served by a single statement.

I became aware of this book too late to use this season, but it's on my list for next year. I also want to check on the video version The Resource Center for Churches has.

Finally, thank you Patty for keeping children's ministry in mind, for lending me your book and for making me aware of such a delightful story.

Christmas: Birth, Death or Resurrection?

2007-12-21T02:48:00.000-06:00

I recently asked a child what we celebrate at Christmas.

I thought by this point in their life they would be well enough exposed to have the concept of Christmas as celebrating Jesus birth down.

The answer started out accurately...

It has something to do with Jesus.

Yes, what about Jesus?

When he got on the cross?

No...

When he came back?

No...

When he was born.

Yes.

It made me think that as an adult I take a lot for granted. I wonder how often I fail to realize the impact of the fact that kids don't have the years of context and experience that adults have.

Kids (and all of us) need the stories told over and over.

Sometimes kids understand more than I expect, and sometimes less. I have to remember to be clear and not to assume too much in either direction.

As concerning as the child's lack of clarity about Christmas is, in some ways I feel quite encouraged by the responses. If you're going to be wrong about what we celebrate at Christmas, I'd say this child had great "wrong"(?) answers: Jesus' death and resurrection.

Even if we have some details to sort out, we're onto something here.

Come to think of it, that statement applies pretty well to a lot of us.

Godly Play Question

2007-12-12T03:13:00.001-06:00

Note: I blog not just for the sake of talking, but for conversation. When I say question in the title of this post, I mean I'm interested in your response.

One of the things done in Godly Play is to snuff a candle in a way such that smoke builds up in a snuffer and can be seen wafting into the room. The language that goes with this action talks about the light being changed so that instead of being in just one place the light can be in every place. One is to notice the smoke getting thinner & thinner, filling the room, saying that even when the light can not be seen, it is there.

A lot of the concept behind that I understand and like.

But I can't come to terms with part of it that seems so contradictory as to be ineffective at best, with the potential to be damagingly counterproductive at worst.

As far as my common sense or admittedly limited scientific knowledge tells me, when you put the candle out, the light is NOT there, neither is it everywhere. The smoke is there and is dissipating through the room. But the smoke is not the light. The light is gone, done, dead, out. To claim that it is still there, only changed, and now everywhere, or filling the room seems just bogus. This seems so obvious to me, that I don't understand how we expect to claim otherwise and have people (mostly children in this case) believe it or use the image as an effective spiritual symbol.

What do you think? For those of you more experienced in Godly Play, what do you make of this? Am I misunderstanding something? Does this bother you? How have kids you've worked with responded to this?

I've taken the liberty to adapt what I say a bit. (I hope this doesn't leave experienced practitioners too aghast.) But I'm not fully satisfied with my adaptation either...I could explain why, but this post is a bit long already. Let me know if anyone is interested enough and I'll say more about that in another post.

Thanks for any insight.

More on the King

2007-12-12T02:55:00.000-06:00

Each week's Godly Play Advent story involves retelling part of the story from each previous week of Advent.

My training in Godly Play is quite limited. I'm not sure if I did it right or not, but in the 2nd week of Advent I didn't repeat the part from Advent I about the king.

The child who included the king in their drawing last week asked why I hadn't told about the king.

Obiously the part about the king made a significant impression. Wow. Interesting, again!

Drawing the Story

2007-12-06T00:29:00.000-06:00

I told the Godly Play story for Advent I on Sunday.

One child present made a drawing. It included representations of the materials used to tell the story and a picture of the king (with crown).

As I wrote that, I just put it together with the fact that this child had been a king for Halloween. Interesting.

Anyway, I was excited to see the evidence of engagement I think the picture represented.

Book: Cherry Pies and Lullabies

2007-11-27T01:30:00.000-06:00

I used this book for All Saints.

The text repeats a simple appealing pattern reflecting that things are passed on generation to generation and as they are, they both change and remain the same.

It's fun to observe details of the pictures...for the benefit of any who may get the book I won't tell you why.

Other titles with a related theme that I put on the Kids' Table at church for All Saints:

Plowie: A Story From the Prairie
The Keeping Quilt
Matthew Wheelock's Wall
The Always Prayer Shawl

All available through the Minneapolis Public Library.

Making Ribbon Sticks - and Doing Things Differently

2007-11-25T22:08:00.000-06:00

My experiment in doing things differently is off to an encouraging start.

Today we made blue ribbon sticks for Advent after the 10:00 service.
There was also a Bishop's Committee report forum, led by Lou, which I believe included report of my attendance at the last Bishop's Committee meeting in which, among other things, I identified the need not to do so much of what I do at church in children's & family ministry alone.

Out of today's events comes the following.

Thank you to:

Everyone who brought blue ribbon
Anthony(??) whose name have to ask his name again...for helping move the table
Madge for volunteering to help a couple weeks ago, being right there today & making a point of inviting kids to participate
Deacon Sandy for going around "ordering" adults to participate
All the adults & children who participated. (I hope you enjoyed yourselves.)
Patti for getting a napkin to clean up my daughter's spilled juice*
Aron for putting the activity in the space it was in & for announcing it
George for agreeing to staple the ribbons onto the sticks on Wednesday
Ethel & Madge for their offers of help in the future
People who I imagine were involved in ways I didn't notice or don't recall.

I feel like we did something together today. That seems good. That will make using the ribbon sticks all the better too.

I've had more than my usual amount of conversations with other people at church in the last couple weeks too. Being where more people are makes that possible. They haven't all been big conversations. But I feel like they're important.

* I only found out about this spilled juice episode later as my kids & I talked about the difficulties they had when I was so taken up with the other interactions of the activity that I wasn't responding to them very well....Mommy my juice spilled and I was trying to tell you but you didn't hear me and then that other lady got a napkin to wipe it up.... Note to Aron & Bishop's Committee: isn't this story an interesting juxtaposition with my story of the juice spill of a couple weeks ago?

The Bishop's Committee

2007-11-21T02:52:00.000-06:00

I attended part of the Bishop's Committee meeting at church last night to talk with them about my work in ministry to children and families.

Thank you to them for having me, for their interaction with me and their support.

As the people on the Bishop's Committee know from what I presented to them, some important things have happened since I last blogged (which has been way too long ago.) As a result I'm thinking, talking, planning about ways to invest my time and energy differently in ministry to children and families.

I think one of the big things is that I need to free up time for relationship building. I also have lots of other ideas, but I need to work out which of those things I'll pursue and how I'll pursue them. I think dealing with those questions within the context of stronger and more extensive relationships with people at church will be important.

I've heard that insanity is doing the same things over and over while expecting different results. I'm looking for different ways to do things in the hope of improved results.

"Yeah"

2007-10-29T02:22:00.000-05:00

I enjoyed little evidences yesterday of my kids picking up on things from church, engaging with them, and enjoying them:

a comment about why they selected a can of pears to bring for the food basket: because they (the recipients) don't have to cook them (I think we talked about this being a relevant issue for some of the recipients once).
a question about the location of a favorite coloring sheet (may I add, with pride & gratification, that I drew this particular coloring sheet)
attentiveness to the drummer who played for the gospel procession (I probably don't have the right word for that)
a question about when we could walk the labyrinth again (it was way back at Lent that we had the labyrinth at church.)
the craning and moving around to be able to see what was going on when Aron invited all the kids up to participate in a baptism
my kids' interest and great fun in interacting with another child at church and Sunday School
one of my kids taking the initiative to write great-grandparents' names on a ribbon stick being prepared for next Sunday's All Saints observance. (I had mentioned doing that, but I think only briefly once, maybe another time at home, but it was done without further direction or assistance, even in spelling the names!)

I also enjoyed the fact that my kids' behavior was better than usual during church today (let's hope we're making genuine progress, not just hitting good luck for a day)

AND I got to interact and visit with another parent more than usual. It was a pleasure to visit and to make an acquaintance a little better acquaintance.

It was a good day.

Community with Aquaintances

2007-10-27T02:35:00.001-05:00

Thoughts about relationships at church, or limitations thereof, with parenting as a contributing factor to both the problem & the need, posted on my other blog: A Grown-up In Church.

Seeking Spirit Sparks

2007-10-22T11:59:00.000-05:00

What do I hear, what do I see?

God, there is so much that happens all at once in a group of kids in Sunday School. I don't think I can multi-task well enough to take it all in. As I'm working with the group, help me notice the things that are most important. What energizes each of the kids? Which ones are having trouble engaging? What's going on at those times? Help me understand what underlies those dynamics - what makes these kids tick? What are their wants, needs, interests, questions? How can I respond to these insights to help make their time at church time that will serve their spiritual lives well now and throughout their lives?

Saying More by Saying Less

2007-10-22T10:39:00.000-05:00

No surprise to people who know kids: you loose their attention so fast when you talk.

However, talking is one of my most natural modes of communication. I often use an excessive amount of words when I do it, even for conversations with adults.

During Sunday School I try to engage kids in active participation. We have some routines they know & respond to well. I add some energy, some theatrics, hands on stuff, visual stuff, cues to maintain focus...still sometimes I find myself talking when it seems no one is listening.

I watch my kids' teachers and I'm impressed. I watch them on purpose to try to pick up on their techniques.

I want to find more & better ways to say more while saying less.

In Session

2007-10-15T02:04:00.000-05:00

It's been too long since I've written.

Meanwhile, my neighbor & I made a set of ribbon sticks that seemed to be make a good first run during the rally Sunday procession.

What I hope will be a new tradition has started and Aron has read a few good kid's books related to the day's gospel during Sunday morning services. Kids seem engaged in listening. One book in particular elicited a spontaneous positive comment from one of my kids. I always like the spontaneous feedback.

Sunday School is under way. I've noticed some particular interest in certain Sunday School activities. For example, on the way to Sunday School I've heard, "I'll do the thanks be to God part."

So, this is good and we'll carry on.

Visiting Another Church

2007-09-10T22:53:00.000-05:00

My kids & I visited another church Sunday so I could check out something they do in their service (more on that another time maybe).

In the process I got to do a bit of something I want to do more of. I got to expose my kids to a church other than the one we normally go to.

They got to see a female priest...hear a different style of music...experience a different physical worship environment...

Little things maybe. Not huge differences from our own church....same denomination, etc.

Still, it's a piece of something bigger I think is important:
letting kids (really all people) know there are meaningful variations in religious belief, expression & practice and that they can legitimately explore and make choices among them.

Reflections on my experience and various conversations with friends & family lead me to believe that it's unfortunately difficult sometimes to realize that. Much damage has been done by some well meaning efforts to keep people in, what is understood as, a definitive right way. Sometimes those efforts have been carried out by means of certain explicit strict mandates. Sometimes those efforts have been carried out through clear but unwritten rules saying on various topics: dare to think beyond these lines and you are in danger of hell. Sometimes it's as simple as a prideful attitude of superiority. Sadly, I think often the Spirit has been quenched.

There's a song that says, "Spirit of the Living God, Fall afresh on us..."
I say that here as a prayer.

And maybe I can make a contribution to the spiritual lives of my kids, by giving them opportunity to see the Spirit afresh in diverse worship settings.

I Can't Use These Texts!

2007-08-31T14:43:00.000-05:00

So much for enjoyment....I've been looking at the lectionary texts for our rally Sunday.

The first text is one of judgement with one of the more mild lines being "they are stupid children."

One of the (familiar) verses from Psalm 51 is "Indeed, I have been wicked from my birth, a sinner from my mother's womb."

There's a lot of this kind of emphasis on sinfulness, judgement, etc. in these texts.

I do think awareness of sin, our need for grace and such things are important for several significant reasons. But how you teach that, especially if you use some of these texts, without doing it in a way that's demeaning to a child by communicating to them that they're a no good, evil doing, stupid kid and if they're lucky God will be nice enough not to do them in for it?

My Old Testament professor at United Seminary talked about texts of terror. He believes that there are some texts that no matter how they are presented in a context such as a church service will be heard in an inappropriate and damaging way by some people present. He believes these texts should not be used in church services, but reserved for contexts in which appropriate discussion about them can take place such as might be done in some Bible studies.

I had my own texts of terror when I was a kid. There were things that really haunted me, for years.

How do I be faithful to what I believe, to what we believe, to the texts, and to our tradition in a way that will be helpful and not harmful to the kids at church?

May I say that I think what it takes to work with kids in a church setting is, generally speaking, way under rated. Childhood is a formative time. Furthermore children's' cognitive abilities and skills are still developing, they are not the same as an adult's. This means that working with kids calls for an adequate handle on religious and theological issues, plus the ability to present them in age appropriate ways. In my experience, this is no small task.

Pray for me and for our kids.

Let's Have Fun

2007-08-31T14:14:00.000-05:00

I'm a little serious sometimes. (In fact that's probably a pretty big understatement and certainly not news to anyone who knows me personally.) I will not say being serious is a bad thing. But a more lightheartedness & levity would no doubt serve me & those around me well.

I've been thinking about the upcoming year of church programming, Sunday School, etc. I think whether you talk to kids, to adults about their current experiences, or to adults about their experiences as kids, one of the big problems related to church is how often it's experienced as boring.

I don't think it should be that way. I think there are things we can do about that. Lets find them. I'm thinking my goal for this year for church and Sunday School programming might be to have fun. In expansive order, not in order of priority specifically to:

Enjoy ourselves
Enjoy each other
Enjoy church
Enjoy God

Don't worry, I won't be throwing out theology or anything like that. I don't think I could do that if I wanted to, it seems like its just wired into me. But if kids (or adults) can't do what they do at church with enjoyment, I don't think they'll want to do it very long. I think healthy & lively spirituality grows out of an inner drive of the spirit (of the person) and the Spirit (God) in communion with each other. This tends to be exciting and engaging. I don't think a healthy & lively spirituality is well nurtured out of an inner drive for duty that has turned to drudgery.

So, lets look for sparks of joy and fuel them so we increasingly enjoy our worship, our learning, our fellowship and our service.

Exasperation and Grace

2007-08-20T01:03:00.000-05:00

Sometimes I become so exasperated, frustrated, angry, embarrassed and humiliated in face of my children's' behaviour during church that I'm close to tears and I feel like fleeing rather than staying in the presence of the congregation witnessing the situation.

I suppose I notice a lot more of the behavior issues than most people in the congregation (I certainly hope so) but I really get about to the end of my rope sometimes. Besides that, I can hardly imagine that some people in the congregation don't think my parenting is seriously deficient and insecurity about that makes me just want to crawl in a hole.

Not to say that there aren't issues, but I have to tell you about the grace that happened again today. I apologized to a person I don't really know who I thought might be particularly unhappy about the disruptions caused by my kids. They smiled and very kindly (and I believe sincerely) told me it was alright. Whew. Thank you, thank you, thank you, again.

This is the context in which I hear "...you have graciously accepted us as living members of your son, our saviour, Jesus Christ..."

They Have to Be Doing Something

2007-08-14T02:40:00.000-05:00

Last week was Vacation Bible Camp. Gethsemane joined St Mark's Cathedral.

My job was basically to be in charge of the 3-4 year olds.

One of the adults (who I think was sent to help for a couple days when it was becoming apparent what a difficult and desperate situation it was to be in charge of the 3-4 year olds) pointed out about this age that they have to be doing something.

I think that has good applicability beyond age 4 and its gotten me thinking in terms of what we offer kids (or adults) the chance to do (other than sit still and be quite) when they're at church.

Here are examples of positive responses from my kids or others that stand out to me :

Participation in the Palm Sunday procession elicited a spontaneous "that was fun."
During some music last week one of my kids wanted me to dance with them.
Going forward and receiving communion seems important and to be desired.
Dipping fingers in the baptismal water to make the sign of the cross is frequently done.
Lighting a candle, making an offering and praying for someone is requested.
Art work is popular. Someone made a note on the art room chalk board "Art Room - Yes!"

I'm thinking about more ways we can make church an active, doing experience. Not doing for the sake of doing itself....but as a way to express and engage with things that often remain cerebral and unengaging to kids, and even to many of us adults.

Cleaned Up Art Room

2007-07-28T01:36:00.000-05:00

I just have to mention this because I'm so gratified. If you're a Gethsemane person & you've seen the mess the art room we use in Sunday School has been...take a peak now. It's not "done"...the floor isn't swept, there are a couple other things...but what a breath of fresh air. I spent hours today sorting through markers & paper & paint & glitter mixed with feathers & sequins & face paint... It looks so much better now. I can just feel the potential of the organized & opened up space. This will be better for all involved. Now both of the Sunday School rooms have some transformation and the start of Sunday School will be here before I know it.

Something They Like

2007-07-26T00:17:00.000-05:00

In spite of all the boredom sometimes associated with church, preferences to be in the play room, occassional requests not to go, and the impression that the most compelling part of the experience might be cookies after the service, I've also noted the following.

When my family was doing a little exercise that involved each of us saying something we like about each of the rest of us, one of my kids listed about me, the fact that I take them to church.

When things came together on a recent Sunday such that we didn't go to church, one of my kids was clearly disappointed.

My kids want to be able to have communion. They will say so, and if behavior issues have caused us to make an exit from the service, they want to get back in in time to receive communion.

To the best of my knowledege none of this comes from any negative motivation such as fear. I don't think things have been presented to them that way and I certainly hope that's not how they've heard things.

I think there are things that genuinely interest them and draw them to church. I don't know exactly what they are. I'd like to imagine deep positive spiritual impulses. It could easily be things much more mundane. Then again, we draw too much distinction between the the spiritual and the mundane. They're intricately intertwined.

I'd like to know what goes through my kids' heads. I'm probably better off not knowing for sure (as if I could). If I could put my finger on it, I'd be likely to go in and muck it up. This way I might keep a more open mind & heart: observing, experimenting, learning as we go, watching for the wind & the flame of the Spirit as it moves.

Crowded Altar

2007-07-09T01:09:00.000-05:00

The kids' rug was crowded yesterday. Sometimes so was the altar. Not really crowded, there was plenty of room, it was just that Aron's kids made their way up to him a couple times during the service, adding an extra person or two at the altar.

It was wonderful. I don't know if I can find the words to explain it...but I felt it. There was something good about it. Something moving about it.

I can very much appreciate the benefits of formality, adherence to rules of ritual, silence and solemnity, etc. But there is also something good and right about the freedom and presence of the kids Sunday.

What is that good and right thing? My (hopefully not too rambling) thoughts and theories to explain my sense of it follow.

Jesus' words, "suffer the little children to come unto me and forbid them not." This makes sense. How could Aron, as a priest or as a father forbid the presence of his children with him as he ministers in a service? He couldn't. They belong there. "For of such is the kingdom of heaven." The kids help us realize that this service isn't just about something that we as adults access through our abilities to think and believe and act in a formalized manner. It's about real life and it has to touch us and apply where the rubber meets the road in day to day life and relationships - otherwise what does it mean?

It reminds us that church (at least ideally) is an egalitarian thing. The meanings of church and the Christian community apply to everyone, not just those who can sit still and quiet long enough, or who can understand enough, etc. The way we conduct church should reflect that.

It reminds us that the gospel talks about the importance of us all being as little children. It's not just the priest's kids who belong there on the altar. We all do. The kids' presence just helps us see that. On the one hand I understand the importance of designated roles in which people serve as bearers of religious symbols and the meanings they convey. Yet on the other hand, sometimes those roles separate us too much from each other and from some aspects of our spiritual lives. All of us - laity and clergy alike, children and adults alike, healthy and sick alike, women and men alike...and those fitting many other dichotomies in which we think - all of us, like the kids on the altar, are wandering around in holy places, both profoundly aware and profoundly naive of that which surrounds us; holy places of both religion and life in general that speak of the ultimacies of life & death, that are filled with the presence of the divine, that are infused with struggle as well as grace and love. We are all moving about in this holy place of life with things to receive and things to give.

The image of a little girl at the altar next to her parent celebrating the Eucharist and the deacon standing behind, can be a powerful image.

Crowded Carpet

2007-07-09T00:44:00.000-05:00

There was a crowd of kids in church yesterday. It was wonderful.

The carpet in the kids' area was full of small kids and parents.

It was so much easier to manage the behavior of my youngest because there were so many other kids around to keep things from getting too adult oriented and boring.

It was so much easier to manage the behavior of my oldest because sitting with me in a pew today made more sense than sprawling on the rug fighting over things with a younger sibling.

And I could start to imagine and feel what it might be like to have this kind of group of kids as a regular part of our Sunday morning worship and the Gethsemane community.

Welcome. Welcome back. And thank you.

Somebody Has Been Painting in My Room

2007-07-03T03:53:00.000-05:00

I was like the 3 bears coming back to their house to find that somebody had been doing things there.

I peeked into my Sunday School art room and found that somebody had been in the art room and messed it all up. (Well it's always a mess. Now it's worse).

I went to the next room and found that someone had been there and re-arranged things rather nicely. Did somebody run some kind of program while I'd been away? Were they planning for something I don't know about yet?

Then it clicked.....somebody has been in this room and they've painted it all up! The ugly paint under the awful chalkboard that was taken down months ago has been replaced by a warm blue color all over the walls. Wonderful!

Unlike the bears, I have yet to find the person who did all these things. If they have run off, I'm sure someone knows where to find them. They should be sought out and thanked.

Freedom Follow Up

2007-06-12T03:21:00.000-05:00

After I wrote Freedom one of the songs I sing with kids stuck home.

One of the songs we sing in Sunday School says "I'm gonna sing when the Spirit says sing."
We do all kinds of verses: pray....clap....dance...

Well, let me tell you....I don't.
I often don't clap when the Spirit says clap or dance when the Spirit says dance, etc.,
especially not in church (of all places!)...or if I do I keep it mild there.
I feel too self conscious. People would notice & watch & think who knows what.

I'd like to visit a charismatic type church every now and then, just for it to be easier to let loose.

Kids are a little more free than adults when it comes to doing what the Spirit says like this.
How can we make sure not to quench that in them?
How can we be better models for them?
How can we let them be models for us?

Music

2007-06-12T03:13:00.000-05:00

During Sunday School this week we spent time more time than usual singing songs & playing instruments along. Some of the kids really enjoyed it. They had songs they wanted to sing & songs they wanted to teach.

I've watched some engaging musical things in my kids' school contexts lately too.

I need more good kids' music to use in church.

I should try to remember more of what I sang in Sunday School as a kid. Some of that I'll use, some I probably won't.

Any suggestions out there?

The Bible is Popular

2007-05-28T10:21:00.001-05:00

The Sunday School kids are surprisingly (to me) interested in finding Bible references.

We often look up one of the lectionary readings. Then one of the kids will read some or all of the text. (Some of them love the chance to be the reader too.)

Some kids with limited reading ability are even excited to find the right spot in the Bible.

What makes this so engaging for the kids?

Now that I see this much I'll try to make it work better....obvious basics like be sure there's a Bible available for everyone, same translation so they don't get lost following along...and I have a few other ideas that might be fun too.

Vacation Bible Camp Announcement

2007-05-24T10:48:00.000-05:00

Gethsemane is joining St Mark's Cathedral for "Pilgrimage: Seeking the Kingdom of God," August 6-10, 9:00 am to 12:00 pm. Pilgrims will step back in time to experience the Medieval period, travel to foreign lands, and meet five different Saints. Along the way pilgrims will enjoy music, street fairs, Bible stories and general merriment as we seek to know ourselves, each other, the Creator, the Savior and the Holy Spirit. The program is for children aged 4 through completed 4th grade. Registration is due by July 16th. Watch for more information or contact me.

Freedom

2007-05-21T01:16:00.000-05:00

If I were uninhibited I would dance in church.

If I were uninhibited I would raise my hands in church.

This Sunday at about a time in the service when I felt like raising my hands, but of course was too inhibited to do so, my 4 year old was prancing around the kids' rug area with a basket of toys raised above his head.

Am I projecting my sense of things onto him, or did he feel what I felt and have more freedom to respond than I did?

Cookies for Members

2007-05-07T01:21:00.000-05:00

Things came together in such a way that my kids and I ended up missing the church service and just arriving at church for Sunday School last Sunday.

While still at home, this brought up a question. If you don't go to church can you still get cookies (during the coffee hour after the service)? One of my kid's responses yielded good news and bad news.

Bad news: The responding child may lack a sense of open hospitality that welcomes everbody.

Good news: The responding child feels like they belong at Gethsemane!

They explained that you couldn't just walk in off the street and have cookies, but that if you're a member and you're there before the cookies get put away you can have cookies.
So, my husband, who was leading this conversation, followed up by asking,
"Are you a member?" Response: "Yes."
"Is [your sibling] a member?" "Yes."
"Is Mommy a member?" "Yes."
"Am I a member?" (Now, I should say that my husband is Taoist and his involvement in church is much differerent and more limited than mine.)
Response: "Sort of."

All very interesting.
But my favorite part is that sense of my child's of being part of the church.
That's significant I think.

What a Response!

2007-05-07T01:15:00.000-05:00

There were lots of kids in Sunday School today that weren't there last week when I did the Godly Play Good Shepherd presentation. I ended up doing it again.

Wow, what a response. Great responses to some of the wondering questions were coming faster than I could comprehend or acknowledge them.

I have to try to do more of this.

Godly Play Experiment

2007-05-06T01:01:00.000-05:00

Lasts week's Scripture readings were just too perfect a fit for the Godly Play presentation of the Good Shepherd not to use it, since I've been wanting to work into Godly Play anyway.

So, I made myself a set of materials as close as I could come to what I was supposed to have, practiced the story & did it. I was amazed at how well my kids responded to the materials when I was working with them at home, and how they paid attention during the presentation. Well, most of the time anyway. I do have to admit that one kid (yes, my own) degenerated into potty mouth talk at one point.

They wanted to work with the materials. They had ideas about how they should be arranged. It almost seemed like they were already familiar with the sheep & shepherd story. My kids each attended a year of Catechesis of the Good Shepherd at another church so I asked about if they had heard about the topic before and if so where. The answer wasn't very clear....something like "I can't really explain it." So, I conclude either this is stuff that is very graspable, or more likely, they absorbed it previously without really being able to identify when and where. Of course this is happening to them all the time, but its interesting to see likely evidence of it. I only hope they are absorbing as little bad or troublesome stuff as possible and and lots of good and helpful stuff.

"Keep the Kids Away" - A New Take

2007-04-09T01:27:00.000-05:00

During church Sunday it clicked for me why it might have been that some of Jesus' followers weren't too keen on letting children near Jesus. I guess I'd always assumed it was just general disrespect for children. I'm not sure why it took me this long to put two and two together and see another possiblity.

Maybe the disciples wanted to keep kids away from Jesus because kids do things like disrupt quiet parts of liturgy with talking and loud noises. Maybe it was because they distract the adults with them, impairing adults' ability to engage in religious services or meaningful conversations. Maybe it was because of the way kids try parents' patience by pushing, pulling, clinging and fidgeting. Maybe it was because kids embarrass their parents by putting parental shortcomings on display for congregations of people to see. (Not that I have experience with any of this of course!)

But of course scripture says that Jesus welcomed the children. Let me sum up a lot by saying, I'M GLAD! I'm glad for me kids. I'm glad for me - I need that kind of welcome and affirmation. After my kids have been behaving poorly, my patience has worn thin, my anger flared and my frustration soared, coming forward with my kids, each of us extending our hands to receive communion is a wonderful and welcome grace.

Stories & Pictures by Kids

2007-03-09T00:34:00.000-06:00

I have a new book. Someone came across it in a thrift store and bought it for me!

It's called Jesus, This Is Your Life, Stories & Pictures by Kids.
It's edited by Jeff Kunkel, a Methodist minister, dated 2001, published by Augsburg Fortress.

It's full of stories from the gospels written in the words of 5-12 year old kids, accompanied by illustrations also done by the kids.

Initially I got exited about it because of how the project of creating the book as well as the sensibilities of the editor relate to my own projects and perspectives.

I often give the kids in Sunday School time to create drawings, paintings and other art work in response to the biblical text or the topic of the day. The goal is to offer a way for them to work with the story and express themselves related to it. That process can also lead to something interesting and meaningful to the creator and other viewers. I haven't published a book like Kunkel has, but some of the kids' work was exhibited in the Christmas display, some is now on view outside the Sunday School rooms, and I have some more ideas rattling around.

As I've looked further at the book I've also become more interested in the stories. When I think about how I'm going to tell a Bible story to kids, I easily become bogged down in issues about faithfulness and accuracy related to the text. Without entering a discussion on the nature of Scripture and appropriate ways to handle it, I will contrast my experience with what I observe in the children's stories. The children's approach seems much more free and unconstrained. They re-tell the stories in their own words resulting in stories that are readable, relate-able, fun and interesting.

Those at Gethsemane can look for the book on the Kids' Table or ask me about it.

Children's Books for Everybody

2007-03-01T15:35:00.000-06:00

Last Sunday grown-ups at Gethsemane's Adult Forum got to enjoy poems from the kids' book Food Fight. Over the next few weeks the forum will continue to focus on the Millennium Development Goals. Each week the adults and kids will spend part of the forum / Sunday School time together. I anticipate each week including a story from the children's book Going to School in India. If you're a child, youth or adult from Gethsemane, or if you're in our area, you're invited to come & see what its about.

I'm realizing that books can be great to use with kids and that some of those same books are great for adults. The reasons vary, depending on the book and the goals of the reader.

I recently heard about a priest who reads a children's book during the Sunday morning service each week. When she doesn't the adults miss it.

Maybe over time I can share some books I like with you and we can find some more good ones together. If more of you have favorites, I'd like to hear what they are. Let me know.

Explain it to a Kid

2007-02-22T16:28:00.000-06:00

I left the Ash Wednesday service thinking about how I would explain the smudges on my forehead to my children. I formulated & reformulated explanations. I tried to arrive at one that would be accurate, understandable, brief and convey what I wanted to my children.

What a tool for exploration and growth of one's faith & beliefs figuring out how to talk about them with kids can be!

Try it out! Pick any topic you want, or go with the one about the ashes.

Where did you struggle? What insights did you gain? What questions did you discover?

Processes like this can be happily invigorating or horribly scary.
Rest in God, let the Spirit lead you.

My Blogs are Back!

2007-02-15T09:35:00.000-06:00

Finally everything seems staightened out! I'll be able to write again!

Anticipate updates about once a week here and/or at http://www.agrown-upinchurch.blogspot.com/.

I hope you'll join me in thought, conversation and action.

Why No Posts?

2007-02-02T00:24:00.000-06:00

I guess you could call it technical difficulties.....I haven't been able to get access to post and I'm not 100% sure how I got here this time!! At least I'm here, which is progress. So...hopefully this isn't the last post you see for a long time again....if it is, now you know why. If worse comes to worse, check the comments on this post....I may end up deciding to start all over, on either a temporary or permanent basis....If I do I'll post the new address in the comments here (I seem to be able to post comments on my blog, but nothing else.) So, back to trouble shooting....and hopefully writing again soon!

Chalk Art

2006-12-20T13:57:00.000-06:00

The chalk board in the Sunday School room used to be a problematic distraction from the things I had planned for the kids. I tried putting away the chalk. The kids always got it out again. Finally I figured out the obvious: don't fight it, use it.

I don't let the kids use the chalkboard just anytime, but during the times I give them choices about what to do (modeled after an approach I picked up at a Godly Play training session), working on the chalkboard is one of the options. One or more of the children often choose to work with chalk and their work appears meaningful.

I've photographed some of their work before erasing it and plan to include some pictures in the display of personal Christmas items at church beginning Christmas Eve. They're pleased about this and I hope it communicates to them that their work is valuable, which I believe it is.

Church Uniforms

2006-12-11T10:19:00.000-06:00

A few Sunday mornings back a special event was being celebrated at church. The church was unusually full with people who had come specifically for the occassion. They were dressed up, men in dark suits, etc. The attire was quite appropriate to the occasion, but certainly more formal then the congregation as a whole dresses usually. A child asked me, "Why are all those men wearing the same uniform?"

A Grown-up in Church

2006-12-08T16:08:00.000-06:00

The unusual experience of attending a church event without my children last night was the final impetus for starting a new blog: A Grown-up in Church. You can find it through the link on the side of this blog. Its address is www.agrown-upinchurch.blogspot.com.

Liturgical Language

2006-12-05T12:01:00.000-06:00

Recently I've noticed a new kind of participation in the church service by one of my kids. They've started to verbally join in parts of the service where the congregation speaks or sings. Sometimes they know the words, often they don't, but mumble along anyway. I wonder what they think, what they feel, what factors consciously or unconsciously motivate this.

I've also found in Sunday School the kids are often very responsive to chances to lead or respond to brief liturgical exchanges such as:

God be with you. - And also with you.
(God is with you or The Lord be with you meet the same enthusiasm and ease.)
Let us give thanks to the Lord our God.- It is right to give our thanks and praise.
Hear what the Spirit is saying to God's people. - Thanks be to God.

Reading the transcript of "Speaking of Faith: The Spirituality of Parenting," (see previous post) reminded me of this. Rabbi Sandy Sasso spoke about kids needing a language to express their spirituality. I don't think she meant just learning the language of liturgical responses. But I do think this can be a valuable part of it.

A bit later Rabbi Sasso says these things that are akin to my perspectives:

"I think much of religious education tends to be the transmission of a set of rules or dogmas or information. But the very best religious education is much broader than that and gives children a sense of a greater presence. I mean, why follow the rules, you know? Why do the rituals? Why pray? I mean what's behind all that?"

For some liturgy can be cold, dry, boring recitation while for others that same liturgy can be rich, evocative and filled with positive meaning. Realistically our experience of it within a given Sunday, from week to week or between given periods of our lives varies. It can include both those descriptions and points in between.

So the question is, what factors will help kids be able to experience meaning through these phrases? How do I teach these phrases in a way that will facilitate that? What general approaches should I take or not take? (I know, books have been written on that topic.) What insight or questions do you have on this from your own interaction with kids or your own experience with liturgy? What allows liturgy to be meaningful rather than empty?

Where Do I Start?

2006-11-29T23:30:00.000-06:00

Where do I start to talk about all the things that I got excited about listening to "Speaking of Faith: The Spirituality of Parenting?" I missed its original broadcast, but there it was again last Sunday. Listen for yourself or read the transcript through http://speakingoffaith.org. It too asks, where do I start, in relation to spirituality, religion and children we care about. Its insights are applicable well beyond issues of children and parenting, which I guess is as it should be.

Where do I start? I'll take a stab in my next entry.

The Typical Question

2006-11-17T18:05:00.000-06:00

If you ask yourself or kids the typical question for this time of year, what are you thankful for, I'm guessing you'll get a mix of three kinds of answers:

1) "I don't know" or "nothing"
2) Things we're thankful for in a logical, mental way
3) Things for which we have heart felt appreciation and gratitude

I'm not knocking #2, but what's more interesting to me is #3. Sometimes I think we don't know how or don't get around to recognizing those things. Sometimes thanks can seem a bit of an abstract concept.

How might we recognize things for which we are thankful? How might we foster deeper appreciation for things we're only logically thankful for? Here are some ideas I'd like to try out more.

Notice when your kids spontaneously say thanks - beyond the obligatory times. What is it they're appreciating? What are they saying thanks for?
Notice when you say thanks - the matter of course times and the intentional times. What are you appreciating? What are you saying thanks for?
Notice what you or your kids really enjoy.
Practice mindfulness.
Try playing games that facilitate thinking and talking about the things we like. For example, we have a game called Whoonu that involves players guessing what among several things another player likes best. That player then ranks the things guessed by the other players to be their favorite.
Make a game of tracing things taken for granted back through the long processes by which they come to us and back to their origins

I'd be interested in your thoughts on the topic, and what happens if you try some of the approaches above.

Hearing When You Least Expect It

2006-11-13T02:00:00.000-06:00

At our house we frown on calling other people stupid. In a recent sermon Aron told a story in which he quoted one character calling another stupid. One of my kids, who I had no idea was tuning in at all, was delighted to tell me, "Aron said stupid! Aron said stupid!"

I wonder what else they're hearing that I wouldn't guess.

Children's Bibles

2006-11-10T10:38:00.000-06:00

I've never been too taken with children's bibles. One problem was that they aren't really Bibles (this doesn't bother me so much these days.) They seem to have dry archaic illustrations, or laborious text, or more sexism than I can easily swallow, or insert too much moralizing, or whatever.

I thought I had a hit with Read Aloud Bible Stories by Ella K. Lindvall. Colorful illustrations, lyric text...but I choked when the creation story talked about the creation of a daddy and a beautiful mommy. It didn't talk about a beautiful daddy and beautiful mommy, the daddy wasn't cited as handsome, the mommy wasn't intelligent and wise.....but she was beautiful! I tried skipping over those pages....but kids kind of notice that (and it wasn't the right time for a discussion on sexism.)

Maybe I haven't looked far enough for good children's bibles. I've just generated a list of over 100 collections of bible stories from the public library. I didn't expect to find so many! I probably won't go for the Precious Moments Storybook Bible. But, I do have lots to check out: a board book, a comic book, The Bible in Pictures for Little Eyes, The Taize Picture Bible, The Bible-The Really Interesting Parts....

I'll let you know what I find. Meanwhile I'm curious about your experiences. Do you remember a children's bible from when you were a kid? Have you found some that you & kids you know either like or dislike?

Jumping In

2006-11-09T10:15:00.000-06:00

I plan to write about children in church from the perspective of a volunteer children's and family minister and of a parent. I also want to explore what it means as adults to be in community with children, and what Jesus' words about welcoming children and being like them may mean.

Someone encouraged me not to be daunted by the idea of writing for most anyone to read by saying that no one will read this anyway. I'll try to take courage from that, but hope it's not entirely true. I hope this will provide a forum for at least some thought and discussion - (beyond that in my own head!)